Actually, I’m not going to talk about cake in this post, despite the title. I am going to talk about eating like a French person and how I lost weight and built muscle mass on a diet which included croissants, hot chocolate, espresso, wine and plenty of bread and cheese.
Some of you may remember when I came back from an earlier meditation retreat suggesting that you try to chew each bite thirty times to help you slow down and pay attention to the tastes and textures of what you were eating, to be present for your meal and to improve your digestion. Well, the French have another method for making meals slower and more enjoyable: some of it is in the meal service and much of it resides in the use of the knife and fork.
I am an American. I grew up in a culture where we eat with our fingers and turn even pieces of meat into unrecognizable finger foods (Chicken McNuggets, anyone?). Fourth of July aka Independence Day just passed: how many of you ate fried chicken, barbecued ribs, corn on the cob with your fingers? Raise those sticky hands and now wipe them on your napkins. But the list goes on. Who eats fruit by picking it up and taking a bite, perhaps over the sink, if it is juicy? How do you eat pizza, French fries, hamburgers?
At Villefavard, the first thing that appeared at dinner was a cold soup in a narrow glass (My favorite incorporated bacon, melon and cream). Sometimes there was a platter of prosciutto. Lunches began with plates of roasted vegetables, sliced tomatoes or salads and we had food shortages for a few days when the first twenty people through the line thought that that was all they were going to get and filled their plates while those of us further back in the line watched the last roasted peppers, the last tiny green beans, disappear, and saw that we would be eating shredded carrots again. We wrote notes to our teacher and to the administrative team, asking that people be more mindful and moderate in their consumption so that others could eat. I wrote notes.
The problem was a cultural one. Les Américains, not used to eating in courses, assumed that the first food out was all they were going to get and they needed to store up calories for the winter. Our hostess, Justine, spoke to us by the third night. She told us that the French eat in courses, that the chef would put out starters and salads and that later he would bring out the main course, then a cheese course and, finally, dessert. Natalie encouraged us all to try eating the French way — to serve ourselves limited amounts of the first course, go back to our tables, eat that, and then bring our plates back for meat or fish, paella or French lasagna. Meals began to look less like eminent food shortages once everyone realized that there would be more food, but there would not be more salad or crudites after the first service.
I conducted a further experiment beyond eating in courses: I decided that I would carve my food with my knife and fork the way the French did. This led to amusing incidents when we were served roast chicken and I was presented with a piece including a bit of breast, a leg portion and a wing. Only my kitchen skills at disjointing chickens saved me — I knew there was a joint and that I could cut through it to tease the bones apart. Even so, that meal took me a long time to eat, using a knife to remove meat from bones. Because the French method caused me to eat more slowly I had time to fully taste the food I loosed from the carcass and time to notice when I was full. As I cut pears and peaches with a knife and fork, cutting small pieces of goat cheese to eat in between slices of fruit, I remembered that my Irish grandmother always cut apples into slices for me and that apples tasted better that way (We ate the slices with our fingers though in my Grandmother’s kitchen).
A week of eating this way was enough to convince me that it was beneficial. I still ate clafouti, cheese, fruit tart, but I no longer picked them up and absentmindedly stuffed them into my mouth. When I moved on to Paris the next week, I felt more comfortable with my knife skills and did not feel self-conscious eating pommes frites with a knife and fork. I ate pizza with a knife and fork in the Marais and I enjoyed it more than I would have had I picked it up. Many times, after making my way through an apertif and salad I had no room for further food. Other times I ate three courses and coffee. I did revert to outdoor picnics of bread, cheese, fruit and olives sans knife and fork, but only because airline regulations prohibit travel with a handy Swiss Army knife (I do not like to buy things I already own one of).
Eating French-style allowed me to eat a croissant and a hot chocolate for breakfast each morning. I stayed a few blocks away from the Eric Kayser bakery on the Rue de Bac. Each morning I put on my only pair of pretty shoes, walked to the boulangerie after it opened at seven, sat at a small square table facing a window and ordered my chocolate chaud and un croissant. Un croissant, not deux or trois. Eric Kayser’s croissants are light with an airy interior, stretched strands of yeast dough with the freshest, sweetest butter flavor. The crust shatters slightly, but does not produce a plate full of crumbs. The chocolate is rich and dark, served with optional sugar, which I never added or missed. I looked forward to my petite dejeuner and was sorry to leave Eric Kayser behind when I moved to the Bastille for my last two nights, but I found one other bakery with fabulous croissants by noticing a man carrying a small sack of bakery goods on a Sunday when many boulangeries are closed.
I came back from Paris trimmer and more fit, despite all of the wine, cheese and patisserie. Of course, I walked everywhere, often several hours a day, but that is another story.
P.S. Writing Practice Classes in the San Francisco Bay Area: I am contemplating teaching one of my rare writing practice classes this summer. If you would like to learn writing practice as developed by Natalie Goldberg (set forth in Writing Down the Bones, Wild Mind and many other books), please contact me.
This makes such perfect sense, Sharyn, and thanks for sharing. I used to eat everything with a knife and fork, I was brought up that way, actually and my mom still does it, and it truly focuses your attention on the matter at hand as well as the taste of the food. Sounds like you had some lovely dishes in France, as well as participating in somewhat of a cultural awakening…perhaps less for yourself than those at the front of that line! 😉
Where did you grow up that someone taught you formal ways of eating. Betsy? Did you have European parents? We used utensils in my house, including knives and forks, but there were many exceptions to the foods we ate with them.
Aaah your cutlery stories remind me of how I used to eat with my fork and knife in the wrong hand… And still do sometimes 😉
I agree with you, it does base your thoughts all for food (who could not love that!)
I love hearing about your eats and morning croissants my friend what a life 😀
Cheers
Choc Chip Uru
Definitely the life, CCU. I’m already plotting and planning to go back next year. I’ll have to sell lots of paintings to make that happen or teach several writing classes or develop a freelance writing career, but getting back to France is a major motivator.
I do find myself savoring and enjoying my food more. It really helps cut down on mindless snacking.
Yes.
Oh my! You sound like you had a wonderful time, Sharyn. My parents taught us to eat with knife and fork (;) of course they did!) and it has certainly been an eye opener when we’re in the US. But we love all cultures for what they have to offer! Glad you had a great time, great shoes and great food!
I did have a wonderful time, Eva, as you will when you go. We did use knives and forks, of course, to cut meat, to eat salad, to butter bread, but we picked up a lot of things and gnawed on them, too — not in an uncouth manner — my Dad was too strict for that. But we were certainly not taught to eat fruit with a knife and fork, carving off one piece at a time.
I guess I’m a product of a mixed marriage. Dad, being European-born, used a knife and fork. Mom, being American-born, was more prone to finger foods — when at home. As a result, I’m just as likely to carve a piece of fruit before eating as I am to take a bite out of it. I agree with your point, though, we Americans need to slow down when we eat. We should dine and not just eat.
If you just could have seen the people in the beginning of the line scarfing down the entire first course before the rest of us got any, you would have laughed or cried: they just didn’t understand that there would be more food later.
I grew up in England where the use of knife and fork was the norm and I still eat with both utensils here in Canada. I don’t know if this way of eating is better but it feels slower and more practical. I have returned to Europe many times and always appreciate their eating style. Do we live to eat or eat to live? Their slower pacing of dining encourages a greater appreciation of each course and allows spaces for conversation. The different cultural ambiance, of course, adds greatly to the experience. Your writing about your experience, as always, is brilliant, and your art work, especially the first drawing, is lovely…
Thanks for your kind words, John. It is definitely slower to eat everything with knife and fork. Is it practical? Perhaps not with chicken wings. But I have to say it looks better to eat things with a knife and fork and France is all about how things look.
A post of cultural differences. I’d never realised that people eat without a knife and fork (other than chopsticks) 🙂 Finger food is party food for me. Picnics, well they depend on the size and the planning – but I know French picnics are definitely knife and fork territory too (the last one I went to had the most sumptuous roast duck and yes we had proper courses). I also think there is a lot to be said for slowing down.
But the French way of eating does work – breakfast is not a big deal, you don’t get plates, just your napkin. Lunch is the main meal of the day and I love the courses, small amounts. But the thing you reminded me about is the crudite, I seriously got into them in France and have been trying to recreate a few here – whether it is a European or Asian style, it’s definitely a great way to eat and enjoy food.
A thoroughly enjoyable read, Sharyn, and one that makes me want to go back, and soon!
Thank you, Claire. If you ever watch telly, watch how Americans eat on American television shows — it will open your eyes — and the whole world knows the stereotypes of what we eat, the fast food we have exported worldwide (the saddest and ugliest moment of my French trip was when I came out of the Metro at Clignancourt in the far Paris suburbs and came face to face with a grimy Colonel Sanders on a Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise). Eating your main meal at lunch is sensible when you get two hours to eat it. I might take issue with the non-nutritious breakfasts in France, except they are so delicious and the calories in the butter keep you going for a long time!
Hi Sharyn, I was thinking about your post yesterday (after I had commented) and suddenly thought about the way Americans eat from the TV and films – it seems a clumsy way, to cut food with your knife, switch utensils and eat with your fork to then start it again.
And yes France is facing it’s own obesity problems, and the decline of the traditional French meal time, it’s an issue for them and will be interesting to see how they manage it.
I realised there are foods I eat without a knife – pasta 🙂
I was raised to eat almost everything with a knife and fork and setting the knife down between bites. To butter a roll a roll a bite at time (I have since given up this practice). I like the slower pace of the meal. Your art is beatiful – love the peach and fork!
Love the painting of the peach and fork – it is really lovely. I was raised to eat almost everything with a knife and fork and butter rolls one bite at a time. I like the European style of savoring each bite and slowing down the process of eating. Unlike our American style of scarfing down our food.
Thank you, Jane. That painting is a little “dark” to suit me — I’m learning how ink runs, sometimes more than I want it to. I agree with you about slowing down and savoring food — I may start trying to pass as a European in my now rare visits to restaurants.
Hello Sharyn,
I often eat pizza quite methodically with a knife and fork, especially in restaurants. I like it that way as I enjoy having a bit of everything on my fork, and tasting the flavour combinations together.
I’m craving a croissant now too!
Ah, those croissants, Lauren — I’m holding off on learning to make them properly because if I could, I would.
What interesting observations, Sharyn! I’m really intrigued. I already know I eat too fast, and without the consciousness you describe. I’m reading a book right now, “Love, God and the Art of French Cooking,” by James Twyman, and the theme of what you’re talking about comes through and has had me very self-conscious! I’d love to give a try– using the fork and knife much more deliberately! It would take some real practice to even think of it! The croissant and hot chocolate breakfast…divine! 🙂 Debra
When you eat fast you enjoy, perhaps, the first taste of something and the last. The French make a whole ceremony of eating: meals are slow and stately. I suspect they digest their food better. I am not an ace with a knife and fork yet — especially when it comes to carving meat off bones…
Sharyn, sounds like you had wonderful adventures. Croissants in France are the best. They’re bread, cheese, etc. are all amazing. Their beef leaves a bit to be desired but then we have their wonderful sauces to bring it up to par.
My grandfather always told me to eat slowly and savor my food. Now I’m usually the last one to leave the table 🙂
Susan, I was in the Limousin for a week, where the beef is local, grass-fed and delicious. I just happen to prefer lamb, so I never ate steak in Paris. Besides, that gives me an excuse to go back. Eating slowly is so pleasant and so sensual.
Hi Sharyn, your post really made me interested into just how much Americans (is it just Americans?) eat with their hands. I’ve never considered the concept of cutting a chicken leg apart at table with a knife and fork at all odd. Some things are very “typically eaten with hands though”… pizza, burgers, and even for me who uses knives and forks all the time it took some adaptation when I first moved to France. It just seems odd to carve away at a pizza with a knife and fork I have to say (and a burger too… it’s essentially a sandwich), but it definitely does help slow you down and enjoy your food more.
It’s a shame you had trouble finding many open bakeries on Sunday… because bakeries are so common in France… well, in larger towns and cities at least (in villages there may well only be one, which probably might be closed on Sunday) but you’ll often find that 50% of them are closed on, say, Sunday, and the other 50% are closed on Mondays for example. It’s the same with the vacations. It’s common for the French to take a full month off around July/August. They often go on a mass exodus to the countryside and the suburbs of Paris are SO quiet during this time. Many bakeries will work out a schedule with neighbouring bakeries so that at least one place is open during the holiday time.
I am not well-traveled enough to know who else eats with their hands, Charles. Indians do, of course, but they have a well-thought-out system for this. Americans, as far as I know, are the originators of modern “fast food,” the antithesis of Old World (“slow”) food and, for some of us, the antithesis of food at all. The average American, whoever he or she is, picks up chicken legs (and other pieces) in his or her hands (Where do you think Kentucky Fried Chicken got the slogan “Finger-lickin’ good?”). Because we hurry about so much we eat a lot of “to go” food and food out of containers and design “foods” like yogurt pops and energy bars that can be eaten with one hand while driving or typing. Most school lunches in my childhood consisted entirely of sandwiches, fruit, raw vegetables and simple snacks like cookies, just so that we could pick them up with our fingers and eat them. My school also served hot dogs wrapped in paper every Wednesday: yellow paper indicated mustard, white with ketchup, designed so that you held the paper and bit the dog.
When my best friend moved to Germany some years ago she asked her then husband what she needed to ask for to get a cup of coffee to go from a cafe.
He thought about it for a moment and said, “Coffee doesn’t go,” meaning that you sit and enjoy a cup of coffee in the cafe rather than try to take it with you.
P.S. Re: bakeries: On Saturday of my stay I moved to the Bastille area, armed with an Eric Kayser bag showing all of his boulangeries. Although I walked all the way out to Nation I could not find his bakery there and was too tired to search further. Sunday I found a good bakery on a side street by spotting the man with a bakery bag. Their croissants were excellent, but they did not have so much as a counter where you could stand so I ate my croissant on a handy street bench a block away. Monday morning I walked around a bit and, as I suspected, a different set of shops was closed from the day before. Because I had to travel to Charles DeGaulle later with twenty six pounds on my back I did not want to conduct an extensive search for a boulangerie. There was one opposite my hotel so I went there and got the least nice breakfast I had in Paris. You can’t win ’em all and I don’t expect to. The plus was that the lackluster bakery had a wrought iron baker’s gate, blocking off a spiral staircase down into the bowels of the building and I got to watch the baker come up to the shop and then vanish downstairs to his domain.
I heart this post! Savoring food and losing weight… what could be better? Also, have you heard of the book Mindful Eating. I read it a couple of years ago and loved it! 😀
I grew up using both chopsticks and knives and forks. I am right handed so I hold the knife in my right hand and fork in my left, after cutting I put the food in my mouth with the fork still in my left hand. The first time I saw someone using a knife to cut up the food, put the knife down and switch the fork to the cutting hand to eat was a very strange sight to me. Always wondered if this was an American way.
Hi Norma. Yes, I think many Americans eat this way: I do it sometimes, but when I was in France and using a knife more frequently I ate with a fork in my right hand and a knife in my left. I am right-handed, but both of my parents are/were left-handed so I grew up in a left-handed household and do many things with my left hand.
It makes a lot of sense I suppose! Interesting post.
Thank you.
Oh dear you have written about a subject very close to my heart. Table manners. Sharing. Not eating with fingers. Sitting straight at the dinner table. THE dinner TABLE. I always eat with a knife and fork. After travelling and living in Europe and Australasia i can safely say that the only western country I have lived in that does not use utensils – is out here in America.
When did they decide that putting your face close to the plate and shoveling in with a fork was OK. What mother stopped giving her teenagers silverware and said go ahead, use your fingers. Everyone out here eats like a toddler. How did this happen? Sometimes I have to literally turn my head when John’s kids eat. Pushing food onto the forks I make them use with their fingers! In fact i have given them lessons, because i will not eat in restaurants with them like that.. i could go on and on. And their father and grandmother are just the same.
Dinner for me is an occasion. We cook our food so carefully, it is lovely to be able to sit together, eat nicely and slowly savour it and taste it and chat. Oh there I go again.. Fantastic piece Sharyn and SO TRUE! Thank you for writing that. And so honestly. They all think i am weird because I use a knife and fork! c
Well, if you make them read it, perhaps they’ll learn that it is not just you being weird. My father was very strict about table manners because he said he had to be able to take us anywhere and not be ashamed of us. He went a little too far, forcing us to eat things we loathed: to this day I cannot eat English peas or avocado — they made me gag when I was a child and I had to eat them anyway, cold for breakfast if I refused to eat them at the dinner table. He did not teach us how to carve meat off bones though — we were allowed to pick up chicken pieces in our hands. And the only fruit I ever saw him eat with a knife and fork was cantaloupe.
I always enjoy the mindfulness with which you approach each task when you describe your food preparation process and this is how you describe your culinary experience in France, with mindfulness in the doing and in the telling. This makes for a peaceful read that opens the imagination to truly picture what is being said, and savor it. Merci. C’est tout à fait savoureux!
Merci, Granny.
Fabulous post Sharyn! This was precisely my finding on my last trip and I am so looking forward to adjusting to the french way of living (and eating) while we are there. I am very excited to share this with my two girls too. You wtote this beautifully – and I am so happy to hear you enjoyed your time so much! Fabulous!
I know you and the girls will have a good time, Shira.
Just shared this with my daughter via facebook: I know she’ll enjoy it as much as I did!
Thank you, Karen. I hope she likes it.
I really enjoy reading your posts Sharon, as they are truly like reading a short story. Eating everything with a fork and knife reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where Elaine’s boss was eating his snickers bar with a fork and knife. I still chuckle when I think of that episode.
I think the French have it down. It’s all about the experience of the meal, being present with their food and company, and enjoying each and every bite without the guilt of what they are eating (chocolate croissant every morning). They actually look at food as enjoyment and not just something to fill up their gullet!
Thanks, Jackie. The French do know something…
Sharyn, I remember my grandmother setting a very formal table growing up. I was taught early on what fork was used with what food, where they were placed on the table and to keep my left hand in my lap unless using it to pass a dish. Nice sometimes to be able to pick up your food and enjoy a good gnaw.
Maybe, Susan — it’s certainly easier to pick up some foods, but it does make it easier to down them mindlessly. And I don’t suppose we look too nice gnawing on our chicken bones. Okay, corn on the cob, I’ll give you that one (but we used to have corn holders for that so that you didn’t actually touch the corn with your fingers).
[…] “Some of you may remember when I came back from an earlier meditation retreat suggesting that you try to chew each bite thirty times to help you slow down and pay attention to… what you were eating… Well, the French have another method for making meals slower… some of it is in the meal service and much of it resides in the use of the knife and fork…” – The Kale Chronicles – Let Them Eat Cake, Part III, with Knife and Fork, S’il-Vous-Plait: Eating the French Way […]
[…] “Some of you may remember when I came back from an earlier meditation retreat suggesting that you try to chew each bite thirty times to help you slow down and pay attention to… what you were eating… Well, the French have another method for making meals slower… some of it is in the meal service and much of it resides in the use of the knife and fork…” – The Kale Chronicles – Let Them Eat Cake, Part III, with Knife and Fork, S’il-Vous-Plait: Eating the French Way […]